Marriage, jobs, career—life isn’t a test. You choose direction, not a single answer.
We base decisions on predictions.
When you can’t really predict, it doesn’t matter—and life actually becomes easier.
So my bottom line is—”
“Rather than waste your time being stressed over making the right decision, make the decision right.
Randomly choose.
Now, you can randomly choose if you want an Almond Joy or a Snickers.
Nobody’s gonna care, right?
It’s the exact same thing about getting married or not, taking the job or not.
You can only live one life.
If there were some magical way that I could live a life as somebody who's had three kids…”
— Ellen Langer, The Rich Roll Podcast, Episode 813
Why we romanticize the road not taken
When the stakes feel high—school, marriage, jobs, moving—we tend to imagine the paths we didn’t take as brighter.
But we only have data from one life: the one we’re actually living.
If we can’t run parallel versions of ourselves, regret becomes a story built on guesswork.
My experience at the crossroads
Listening to this talk felt like hearing exactly what I needed.
Every day brings choices—sometimes as small as picking a loaf of bread, sometimes as large as changing careers.
I often hesitated, chose something, and still clung to the “maybes” I didn’t choose.
Why?
Partly loss aversion.
Partly not trusting my own decision once it was made.
What I’ve learned is simple: I have the power to make my choice feel right by how I live it.
For me, the way a choice becomes “the best” is by living it in line with my selfness and my values—showing up as myself, on purpose, in everything I do.
One-shot answers vs. answers made by living
If an answer must exist before we act, we stall.
If answers are shaped by experience, then each day’s observations become material for tomorrow’s judgment.
“Right” shifts from a result to a process carried out over time.
From deciding to living the decision
A decision is a starting line.
What we notice, what we learn, and how we refine our relationships and work will grow the same choice into very different lives.
Less hunting for the perfect answer.
More attention to how this choice can be understood and tended.
Today, a quieter shift
Choices always leave something behind. Imagination fills the gap—and often exaggerates.
Look at what’s in front of you more than the stories about what might have been.
Swap “Why did I do that?” with “Given who I was then, that made sense.”
That single line of permission lightens the load.
Don’t rush the verdict.
How you live today’s decision is what changes tomorrow’s you.
If regret brushes past, let it simply point to what you value—then turn the page.
Not answers, but direction.
Not conclusions, but breath.
That’s how a life slowly fits.
Your turn
What regret still lingers?
What are you weighing right now?
Drop a single line in the comments.
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