Learn how to protect your peace and stop overthinking—through the power of the “Let Them” mindset.
For a long time, I was someone who took everything personally.
When my idea got ignored in a meeting.
When friends posted vacation photos without me.
Even when someone made a harmless comment, I’d spend days overthinking, wondering, “Did I do something wrong?”
Then I came across The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins, a bestselling book that completely shifted how I deal with these moments.
One line stuck with me:
Why am I spending so much energy on things I can’t control?
You Can’t Control Everything—And That’s a Good Thing
The message is simple:
Let them.
Let people say what they want.
Let people think what they want.
Let people do what they want.
And then:
Let me.
Let me decide how I respond.
Let me choose how I want to live.
Think about these moments:
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You see your friends hanging out without you on Instagram.
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You post something you’re proud of, and it barely gets seen.
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You speak up in a meeting, and silence follows.
These used to derail me.
But something shifted.
I stopped spiraling.
I paused.
I gave others the freedom to be themselves—without making it about me.
Instead of asking, “Why wasn’t I invited?”
I asked, “Have I been distant lately?”
And I reached out—first.
Not with resentment, but with kindness.
And it felt better than holding onto a silent grudge.
Emotions? Let Them. Actions? Let Me.
We all deal with reactive people.
At work.
In traffic.
Online.
Someone snaps.
Someone overreacts.
Someone unloads their stress onto you.
Let them.
Their emotions don’t belong to you.
Their triggers aren’t your responsibility.
I once read in Harvard Business Review that people who pause—just for a moment—between what they feel and what they do tend to handle stress better and perform more effectively.
That pause isn’t hesitation.
It’s strength.
It’s emotional maturity, in motion.
There was a time I couldn’t stop replaying how my coworkers reacted to my input.
Now I remind myself:
They’re allowed to react.
I’m allowed to move forward.
You Define You
We all care what people think.
We compare.
We scroll.
We wonder if we’re behind.
Someone gets promoted.
Someone launches a startup.
Someone seems ten steps ahead.
Let them.
Their pace doesn’t invalidate yours.
Their highlight reel isn’t your blueprint.
According to the American Psychological Association, people who believe they have control over their own lives tend to experience less anxiety and greater life satisfaction.
But I didn’t need a study to tell me that.
I felt it the moment I stopped outsourcing my worth.
The moment I stopped chasing validation I never really needed.
Rewrite Your Reaction Loop
When something shakes me now, I stop and ask:
Whose emotion is this?
Can I actually control it?
What’s the next best step?
Those questions anchor me.
They shift my energy.
They bring me back to center.
Like when:
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I’m stuck in the slow checkout line → Let them. Breathe.
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I get ghosted after a great conversation → Let them. Release.
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Someone’s life looks shinier than mine → Let them. Refocus.
Letting go isn’t detachment.
It’s discernment.
It’s refusing to pay with your peace.
In a Noisy World, Choose Your Volume
Letting people be who they are isn’t weakness.
It’s clarity.
It’s quiet strength in a loud world.
Yes, I still get triggered.
But I bounce back faster.
I stay stuck for less time.
Their opinions?
Let them.
My peace?
That’s mine.
So next time something gets under your skin, try this:
Let them.
Then, let me.
What’s been bothering you lately?
And what’s one “Let Me” decision you can make today—to take your power back?
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