Spending to Impress Hurts. Spending with Purpose Builds Freedom.

Silhouette of four young adults jumping on a beach at sunset, representing freedom, joy, and smart lifestyle choices.

Are you in your 20s or 30s, trying to make smart financial choices while balancing rent, groceries, student loans—and maybe still wanting to enjoy your life a little?

You're definitely not alone.

I used to wonder all the time:
"What kind of spending will I regret—and what won’t I?"

Over the past few years, through trial and error (a lot of it), I’ve learned some valuable lessons about money. Not from textbooks, but from real experiences—some painful, some empowering. Here are four spending and saving lessons that helped me regain control and clarity.

1. Don’t Spend to Impress—It’s a Trap That Drains You

In my early 20s, I bought things because I wanted to look like I had it together. A new outfit for every party. Pricey brunches I couldn’t afford. Travel photos that looked better online than the trip actually felt.

Looking back, I realize I wasn’t buying for myself—I was buying for other people.

According to Harvard Business Review, social comparison and image-driven spending can reduce long-term happiness and lead to financial insecurity. In the moment, it feels exciting. But a month later, all I had was credit card debt and regret.

My takeaway: If the main reason you want something is to show it off, take a step back. Chances are, you won’t care about it next year.

2. Spend on What Truly Aligns with Your Values

Not all spending is bad. In fact, some of my best purchases weren’t things—they were experiences and tools that matched my priorities.

Like a long beach walk with a friend and a $5 iced coffee in hand. That simple moment made me feel more grounded than anything I ever bought from a store.

Research by psychologist Thomas Gilovich confirms this: people find longer-lasting joy from meaningful experiences than from material items.

I also started exploring secondhand marketplaces and local flea markets. I found items that felt more me, not just what Instagram told me to like—and I saved money while doing it.

3. Don’t Let Frugality Rob You of Joy

For a while, I took saving money too far.

I skipped meals, lived off vending machine snacks at work, and passed up every invitation that cost money. On paper, I was saving. In reality, I was tired, isolated, and unhappy.

Being frugal isn’t about deprivation—it’s about balance.

Now, I still stick to a budget, but I leave space for small joys: a friend’s birthday dinner, a book I’ve been dying to read, or just ordering Thai food after a long week. And I feel better and more in control.

4. Your Best Investment Isn’t a Stock—It’s You

The most powerful spending decision I made in my 20s? Investing in skills.

One month, I spent almost an entire paycheck on a real estate workshop by Robert G. Allen. It felt reckless—but that course eventually helped me buy my first rental property. That one decision built passive income I never thought was possible.

I also upgraded my laptop—not to flex, but to improve my freelance workflow. It paid off.

According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, 42% of Americans in their 20s and 30s now have a side hustle—many of which require basic tech tools or creative skills.

Lesson learned: The right investment in yourself isn’t a luxury. It’s a smart strategy.

Final Thoughts: What My 20s Taught Me About Money

Spending to impress others? Regret.
Saving so aggressively that you lose joy? Also regret.
Spending on experiences, growth, and peace of mind? Worth it—every time.

Whether you’re trying to build savings or just survive the week, the best thing you can do is make financial choices that actually reflect who you are—not who you’re trying to impress.

If you’re unsure whether to eat it—eat it.
If you’re unsure whether to buy it—don’t.

Your Turn

What’s a spending decision you totally regret? And what’s one that actually made your life better?

Share it in the comments—I’d love to learn from your story, too.